19 November 2010

November

This month has been very LONG! The Army can not decide what they are doing with us and if we are going home or staying for the deployment. Justin really wants to go home and I get that but I have an amazing life here. I have awesome friends and I love my church and church family more than I ever thought possible. I learn more and more everyday from my pastors! I realize that this has been coming for a long time but I am still not ready. Justin has been saying that we are staying for the deployment for over 6 months. I finally gave in about 3 months ago and decided that this was going to be a good time for us. Now we are LEAVING!!!????!!!!! I want to go back to the states b/c there will be a possibility of seeing family but they could still put us in California or Arizona or something, how often would we honestly get to see everyone? Not very! Plus we haven't really gotten to do any of the traveling that we wanted to do while we were here and Justin would get R & R plus 30 days of leave once the deployment is over, that is a lot of traveling! Then we could leave!
I realize that I am being selfish! Justin wants to leave b/c of his NCOs and b/c he wants to advance his career but we are not guaranteed that his next unit will be better than this one! What if they are worse then these guys? I just needed to get all of this off of my chest! I am trying REALLY hard to let God have all of this and know that he has a plan one way or the other but it is HARD! I want to plan it out and know where we are going and have a perfect PCS.... can someone hook me up with that? Please?
Anyway....
I am also a bit depressed right now. Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming and Grandma isn't here and Lord, I miss her. I realize that we all fought through Christmas every year but I like to remember the better parts. IDK how many more holidays we will have with Pop and that scares me! I am just hoping that we get to have one holiday with him before he passes. I am excited that he is getting so involved and has so much going on, maybe he has a couple more years left! I would love that! The thought of Piper not know him, just makes me want to cry.
On a happier note, Amber is doing really well. She has a boyfriend who she seems to really like. It is her first boyfriend since she has been in Germany. They were really respectful about bringing their relationship to our attention. He has been over and hung out with us a bunch and I really like him. He is very respectful and has even come to church with us!
Piper is doing really well. She is teething so we have dealt with a few nights of no sleep and some fevers but other than that, she is just growing like a weed! I am so in love with her! She grows more and more everyday!